Of Gods and Mortals
by La Fuego
Summary: For a lowly human being to fall in love with divinity is taboo. There are heights that one just cannot aspire for. There are boundaries that one must never cross. OshiAto . Rated for language and mature themes.
1. Divinity vs Mortality

**Title:** Of Gods and Mortals  
**Genre:** Angst, Drama, Romance (if your view of romance is as warped as mine)  
**Beta: **_chilibreath, pinksnow_  
**Fandom: **Prince of Tennis  
**Pairing:** OshiAto, Dirty Pair later on...  
**Disclaimers: **All Konomi-sensei's. Didn't make money off of this. Don't sue.  
**Summary: **"Divine beings are there to inspire, to guide, to lead… but for a lowly human being to fall in love with divinity is taboo. There are heights that one just cannot aspire for. There are boundaries that one must never cross."  
**Author's Notes:** The fifth story in a series of completely unrelated first kiss fics. This one was lovingly and whole-heartedly written at the request of **pinksnow**, the angel who watches over my writing.

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First Kiss Series  
**Of Gods and Mortals**

He is exquisite. Stunning in a way that no man should be. I look at him and fall into the belief that superlatives came into existence only because there was a need to try to define him. _Try_ being the operative word here, because no amount of words would ever be enough to define Atobe Keigo.

He is perfection personified. A complete and absolute being unto himself. So appallingly capable that he doesn't even need a vice-captain to keep in hand the two hundred member-strong tennis club of Hyotei Gakuen. A snap of his fingers affords him unconditional control over everything he surveys, as though singularly blessed and touched by divinity. No, that's not quite right—as though he, himself, is of divine origin. And just as any deity is revered and worshipped, he too, gets more than his fair share of awe-inspired respect and adoration.

But deities were never meant to mingle with mere mortals. Divine beings are there to inspire, to guide, to lead… but for a lowly human being to fall in love with divinity is taboo. There are heights that one just cannot aspire for. There are boundaries that one must never cross.

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I feel his pull on me, as though an external center of gravity.

I am cool. I am calm. I am touted to be Hyotei's own genius, at a level with Seigaku's Fuji Syuusuke. I am everything that everybody expects me to be—and then some—but only because of _him_. Only because Atobe expects it of me.

But despite the almost unholy hold he has on me, I still have my pride. I will not be one of the sycophants who cling to him and feed his (justifiably) immense ego. I cling instead to a different reality. A reality far-removed from the insistent longings I tamp down each and every day at the sight of one who never fails to remind of Apollo, said to be the most beautiful of the Greek gods. Or perhaps it would be more accurate to associate him with Phoebus, Apollo renamed after he acquired the glory of the god of the sun. Sometimes I even get the ridiculous urge to ask Atobe if he ever dazzles himself when he looks at himself in the mirror.

I heaved a sigh at the outrageous turn my thoughts have taken and decided that I've dragged my feet long enough. Practice has long since ended and I've bounced enough thoughts and tennis balls against that innocent wall.

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I entered the club room just in time to see Shishido and Ohtori adjusting their tennis bags on their shoulders. They gave me an almost absent-minded wave as they walked out of the room, completely absorbed in the conversation they were having on the merits of the plushie catcher in the arcade nearest the school versus the one beside the tennis equipment store downtown.

I breathed out another sigh, this one of relief, as I pulled my eyes away from the door the Silver Pair had just gone out of, thinking that my procrastination ploy in order to get the club room to myself had worked.

And then I felt as though the bottom of my stomach had fallen out when I turned my eyes to find Atobe Keigo elegantly perched on a club room bench. He was looking oh-so-tempting in his boxers and his immaculate white undershirt that showed beneath his unbuttoned uniform top, as he generously slathered his right leg with a subtly sweet smelling lotion. I couldn't help but stare at him, completely mesmerized by the hypnotizing motion of his hands, feeling every bit the gauche 15-year old Kansai boy that I was.

"That's very rude, you know."

My eyes snapped up to Atobe's face at his quiet declaration. He was _smirking_ at me, the jerk!

"You're staring at me, and that's just rude," he reiterated. "Don't look at me like that; it makes me feel uneasy."

And then, completely contradicting himself, Atobe made a production of lowering his right leg and bringing up his left leg to receive its share of lotion as he threw a coy look at me through half-lidded eyes. What started out as an act of unintended, artless seduction became a full-blown attack on my self-control.

I blinked at him once before leaning a shoulder to the closest locker and crossing my arms at my chest. "Atobe, you live on attention. You perform better when you know there are people watching you," I drawled out, deep voice heavy with the accent I knew a lot of people found irresistible. Two can play _this_ game. "You probably get off on the thought of a million eyes trained on you," I added before I turned my back on him. I've got to hit the showers before I started mentally berating myself for the sharp edge of bitterness that I let slip along with that last statement.

Atobe's rich, deep-throated chuckle followed me into the first shower stall, along with his smug, "Well, wouldn't _you_ just love to know what I jerk off to?"

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"You're still here," I observed in a flat voice as I briskly rubbed the excess moisture from my hair with the fluffy towel that the Hyotei tennis club room always had an abundant supply of.

Atobe gave me a nonchalant shrug of his elegant shoulders from where he was lounging on the bench directly in front of his locker.

In order to get to my own locker, I had to pass Atobe. And if I were to finish my post-practice rituals, I had to stay within his arm's reach. Honestly! Who did the locker assignments this year, anyway? Whoever thought it was a smart idea to put my locker right next to Atobe's must have been insane!

I mentally calculated the possible risks of going anywhere near Atobe, considering the fact that I was wearing only a towel that rode low on my hips, and that I only had the other towel I used to dry my hair with as a contingency measure, should it become necessary to protect my modesty.

I can still see the ghost of a smirk hovering on his lips. And as though reading the hesitation in my thoughts, a graceful eyebrow arched at me tauntingly.

It was all I can do to keep from blowing out my breath in a huff of irritation before I resolutely headed towards my own locker. I did my best to ignore Atobe, rubbing my hair with the towel again, only more vigorously than was necessary this time, and then nearly suffocating myself in a cloud of body spray, but when it came time for me to re-dress myself, I stopped to look at him.

There I was, clad in nothing but a towel, holding my boxers out in readiness in front of me, and pointedly asking, "Do you mind?"

Atobe's smile, if anything, became even more wickedly delighted before he airily answered, "Not at all. Go right ahead," an unconcerned hand casually waving its permission.

I rolled my eyes and minutely shook my head in disgust. The guy who did the locker assignments this year was _definitely_ an idiot.

And I am consigning him to the deepest of the nine levels of hell.

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Finally dressed and having just finished tying the laces to my shoes, I was blindly grasping beside me for my eyeglasses only to find nothing but thin air. With a frown, I looked to the space beside me on the bench where I was positive I laid down my glasses before starting to get dressed.

"I don't understand why you don't just get rid of these things," Atobe drawled out from behind me.

My head swiveled back to look at him, the very picture of relaxed indolence, leaning against a set of lockers as he toyed with my eyeglasses in his hands. I had been so intent on ignoring him, I didn't even notice when he moved to stand behind me.

"I would very much like to have my eyeglasses back, Atobe." I requested in pretty much the same tone one would use while asking for candy from a drooly two-year old kid.

Atobe frowned at me, not appreciating my tone of voice one bit. "It's not like you need them to see clearly," he pointed out as he sexily slinked his way nearer to me in a way that had all my self-preservation instincts screaming at me to run away.

Far too soon, I found myself far too close to Atobe. Apparently, he had no compunctions about invading my personal space. He stepped over the bench I was sitting on and stopped right in front of me, as though having him lodged firmly between my legs was the most natural thing in the world. He brought his face down closer to my own and huskily repeated, "You don't need them to see clearly."

My mouth instantly dried up at his close proximity, but I still managed to answer him with, "No, I don't need them to see clearly… but I need them to keep people from seeing me too clearly…"

I only saw a split-second of a triumphant, knowing gleam in Atobe's eyes, as though telling me that he knew all along I was going to say that, before I felt his lips on mine.

Dominant.

Powerful.

Possessive.

Hungry.

For another split-second, I wondered if, perhaps, my mind had finally broken. I felt his tongue sliding seductively against mine, inviting me to give in and take the pleasure he offered. This was _Atobe_!

Hyotei's king.

An impossible dream.

An unreachable god…

Some semblance of sanity kicked in and I wrenched my lips away from Atobe. I was breathing rather harshly and I was pretty sure I was looking owlishly up at him. "This can't be real," I whispered hoarsely.

Atobe gave a delighted little chuckle before bringing his face sinfully close to mine, so close that our noses were almost touching. "Why can't it be real? I've seen you looking at me. I've felt your eyes on me more times than I'd care to count… Can I not be benevolent and let you have what you want?"

His words sent hope surging within my chest. Could it, indeed, be possible? Can one get close to the sun and not be burned? Could I reach out to a dream and not have it disappear into a cloud of evanescent smoke?

A hand hovered a few inches from Atobe's face, hesitating to touch for fear of some divine retribution…

"Yuushi…" he whispered in that silken voice of his, and I couldn't help the shiver that ran up my spine. He gave me a small smile, took my hand to meet his smooth cheek, before continuing in that soft voice, "I'm not going to break. Touch me."

And that was all it took to demolish the iron control I had over myself. In one fluid motion, I stood up, pushed Atobe back, pinned him between myself and the lockers, and kissed him the way I've always dreamed of doing. I was gentle but thorough, worshipping those soft lips as though there was no tomorrow. He let out a demanding little moan and I took advantage of his parted lips, slipping my tongue in to mate with his. He slanted his head at an angle and wrapped his arms around my head, drawing me in closer, drowning my senses until all I can think of and taste and feel was him.

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"Is that what you wanted, Yuushi?" Atobe softly asked against my lips.

I drew away from him slowly, taking that opportunity to clear my head of the fog that blurred the lines of reality in my head. "No, not really. But it doesn't matter, does it?" I answered just as softly.

_'Because that's all I'm getting…'_

He raised an eyebrow at that. "Oh? What makes you think so?"

I gave a soundless, mirthless chuckle. "Planets revolve around the sun, Atobe. The sun does not revolve around anything… or anyone."

A few minutes of pregnant silence hung heavy between us. Atobe was silently regarding me. I was unable to pull my gaze away from his.

A part of me realized that Atobe was trying to communicate something to me. Something that I, alone, should be able to understand. But deeply ingrained habits are hard to break. I've been running away from him for so long, keeping myself in check, sparing myself from the certain heartbreak and disappointment… I couldn't understand what he was trying to tell me.

I did not want to understand.

"Ne, Atobe…" he quirked an eyebrow at me, waiting for me to continue. I cocked my head to one side and asked, "Do you ever dazzle yourself when you look at yourself in the mirror?"

A look of utter surprise went through Atobe's features for a fleeting second before his mask of untroubled self-assurance fell firmly into place. He smiled the smile that he usually reserved for a full gallery during tennis tournaments, flicked the hair out of his face, and drawled out, "Who do you think you're talking to, ahn?"

And with that, he turned his back on me. An obvious dismissal. A god who grew weary of his tiresome devotee.

"Oshitari, lock the door on your way out," he instructed me without even looking back at me. "I still have a ton of paperwork I need to take care of for the club and the student council. Ore-sama does not wish to be disturbed."

I followed his retreating figure with my eyes until he disappeared into this little corner of the club room that served as his office.

"Hai, buchou," I quietly whispered.

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There are heights that one just cannot aspire for. There are boundaries that one must never cross.

Atobe Keigo is a god. And I, a mortal.

A prodigiously gifted mortal.

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But a mere mortal, nonetheless.

_La Fuego  
12/26/07_

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_**_End Notes:  
_**1) This could be the end of the story right here... or you could move on to read the epilogues if you still haven't had your fill of angst.

2) A wikipedia entry for Hyotei's students actually does tell that Oshitari Yuushi has no need for eyeglasses. It says, and I quote:

_"Along with Tezuka and Inui, they are known as the "Megane Trio" (Glasses Trio) and often performs songs and mini-dramas together. It was pointed out, however, that Oshitari does not actually need glasses as his eyesight is not faulty."_

3) ...So yeah... Comments and reviews are much appreciated.


	2. Epilogue

_--Yuushi's Epilogue--_

I stepped out of that club room, barely managing to keep the daze and confusion from overwhelming me. I was careless and I let myself fall into a raging sea of emotional mayhem. That one moment when Atobe's warmth invaded my senses, I felt exhilarated—I felt free! For a foolish moment of false clarity, I thought I broke free from the labyrinth of confusion that held me back from taking that which I wanted the most. For a moment, I let myself believe… I let myself hope… that perhaps, it wasn't impossible to reach for the unreachable after all. For a moment, I let go of that other reality that I used to cling to so desperately.

"Yuushi…"

I looked up at the gentle entreaty uttered in my name.

Gakuto stood alone, waiting for me to come out of that clubroom for who-knows-how-long. The huge orb of the setting sun illuminated him from behind, casting a lengthy shadow before him. A gentle wind ruffled his hair playfully before settling down. His huge eyes stared at me, as though expecting something from me… always expecting, but never getting. All these things combined made him seem smaller than he really was. Made him seem more fragile.

Almost blindly, I reached out for him. Seeking to ground myself into reality—MY reality. The reality that I have always counted on to keep my head screwed on straight and not go after infantile dreams of bringing a deity and a mortal together.

I took a stumbling step towards him, as though just coming out of an epic ordeal. He closed the distance between us and readily stepped into the circle of my arms. "Icarus falls…" I whispered cryptically.

Gakuto's eyes widened in concern at my softly spoken declaration. "Yuushi, what are you…?"

"Kiss me, Gakuto!"

And in that impulsive demand, I knew he saw it. He saw the Icarus I was seeing within myself. He saw the pitiful image of me desperately making a grab for my feathers, hoping to save myself from certain doom.

But instead of kissing me, he just held me closer. Wordlessly, he calmed me. With soothing little circles on my back, he appeased the choking turmoil that had only moments ago gripped me. I, in turn, clung to him as though my life depended on it—and in a way, perhaps, it did.

"You got too close to the sun…" Gakuto murmured in a tone that was mildly reproving. "And here I thought you knew better than that."

And at those words, I felt the familiar weight of guilt settle in my gut. Gakuto had always known. Right from the very start, he had known that I was using him. He was the solid wall I had that effectively dammed up those longings I thought never to succumb to.

I can easily hazard a guess as to why he put up with this "arrangement" that we had, but it was something I really would rather not look at too closely. Not on top of everything else I had to deal with. And if that made me a cold-hearted bastard, then so be it. Still, I could not push back the fervent "I'm sorry" I sighed into his hair. I owed him at least that much.

"Hush. It's alright. I am not Daedalus. I will not let you fall. I will not let you drown." Gakuto resolutely whispered against my chest.

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_--Keigo's Epilogue--_

He turned away from the window. Away from the sight of the embracing couple. He really didn't need to see that right then.

_'This can't be real.'_

That's what Yuu—no, Oshitari had said. And in his arrogant ignorance, Atobe believed that statement to be a good thing. He assumed that Oshitari was just overcome with the sense of unreality when faced with too much of a good thing. After all, he'd always known of the intense desire for him that Oshitari had secretly harbored. In the foolish bravado that can only be possessed by youth, he boldly extended his invitation:

_'Yuushi… I'm not going to break. __**Touch me**__.'_

That was as close to begging Atobe had ever been. Not that Oshitari would ever know. Not that Atobe would ever admit to it out loud.

_'The sun does not revolve around anything… or anyone.'_

Atobe let out a humorless laugh. He'd heard of people with bad cases of hero-worship, but this was ridiculous! Oshitari was being stupid!

_'Ne, Atobe… Do you ever dazzle yourself when you look at yourself in the mirror?'_

Stopping in front of a mirror, Atobe studied his face carefully. He noted the graceful arch of his eyebrows, the regal line of his aquiline nose, the prominent beauty mark just below his right eye. He completely missed the tears that trembled on his lower lashes, refusing to be shed. He also missed the slight quivering of his lips. Instead, he threw back his head, gave a taunting smirk, and looked down his nose at his own reflection. A typical haughty Ore-sama stare that would have made even the most self-assured being feel insignificant.

_'The sun, huh?'_ Atobe silently asked. Well, the sun still has a few good years left in him before he burns himself out and turns into a gaping black hole of complete nothingness.

_-Owari_

_La Fuego  
12/26/07_

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**End Notes:  
**I think I have exposed myself for the mythology geek that I am. Yes, I have always been fascinated by the Greek and the Roman myths. Norse mythology holds a certain appeal as well, though its hold on me is not as firm as the previous two. The mythology involving Icarus and his father, Daedalus, has been a favorite of mine since time immemorial. Something about that tragedy that could so easily have been avoided had Icarus been a little more cautious just draws me to his character all the more. At any rate, if you are unfamiliar with this particular myth, I suggest you go look it up! It will be worth it, I promise you!

Thank you so very much for reading. If you liked (or maybe didn't like as much as you thought you would), please leave comments and reviews, yes? They feed me and keep me alive! Thank you!


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